G'day from Oz!
Your plight is well understood! I have used KaZaa Lite, WinMX, and i-mesh (lite) on a regular basis, and if it's speed of download you're after, go with i-mesh. If you have the patience of Job, then MX will find almost anything you seek, but it can be painfully slow, with its queues and so on. KaZaa, too, with something approaching 4 million users online at any one time, has most of what you're looking for, but I've never rated it very highly when it comes to download speed. But overall, the speed winner is i-mesh. Doubtless, there will be a few other members of this fraternity who will come forth with their ideas.
Then, make your own choice. Meanwhile, welcome to the club!