[Ramona_A_Stone]

"Your precious little Ashlee Simpson"--beloved icon of liberals nationwide, destroyer of the conservative bastion of taste and morality that used to be SNL.

ROTFLMAO

Thanks for the official inside disclosure on the bulletproof vest btw Jughead. It's nice to see at least one of you republican yucks on the TEAM come clean, even though everyone in the administration, including Bush denied it outright.

"There was nothing under his suit jacket," said Nicolle Devenish, a campaign spokeswoman.

...apparently not even a human being.

Nor was the bulge from a bulletproof vest, according to campaign and White House officials; they said Mr. Bush was not wearing one.

"I don't know what that is," Mr. Bush said. "I mean, it is — I'm embarrassed to say it's a poorly tailored shirt."

But we'll forgive this concerted LIE since it's in the interest of security, and since LYING to us about what's in the best interest of our security in general is the new black in the party's line of Emperor's Clothing.

Sources in the Secret Service told The Hill that Bush "was wearing a bulletproof vest, as he does most of the time when appearing in public. The president’s handlers did not want to admit as much during the campaign, for fear of disclosing information related to his personal security while he was on the campaign trail."

Obviously this lie could save his life, as they wouldn't want any would-be liberal yuck assassin to be wise to a bulletproof vest, clueing them into the crazy idea of trying a head-shot.



It's kind of the same theory that attacking Iraq is making New York safer right now.

Thank god for four more years of consistency.